Headline : I am worried that my introvert teenage son is missing out | Ask Philippa

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He needs to find his own way in the world – not replicate yours. Accepting him exactly as he is will give him confidence

The dilemma I am a father to a 17-year-old-son who is doing well at school. He’s in the first year of his A-levels and managing his studies independently. He has a small group of two or three friends. He also enjoys football, playing in a team and helping to manage a younger-age team. At football he has a similar small friendship group of just two or three other boys.

He describes himself as an introvert. He declines nearly all offers that involve socialising. For example, he won’t go on the football team socials as he says he has nothing in common with the wider team. He almost never goes out with his school friends, preferring to stay in and do gaming. If we go out as a family, he will decline (if he has the option, but he would probably go to a family birthday meal out of obligation).

Is all this teenage fear of embarrassment? I’m remembering the good times I had at that age, going to parties, and I feel he is missing out and I want to help him prepare for an independent life. It can be hurtful when he refuses to even hear me out. My current strategy is to make all opportunities available to him, but leave it to him to decide, currently he declines all of them!

Read more from the original article on here at www.theguardian.com.

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